Stop the Suffering Cycles

Stop the Suffering Cycles

Wow the last few months have been a ride, huh? We’ve had so many things occur and so many random things come up in the last few months.Through all of it, I think it’s super important for all of us to pay attention to the signs we’re receiving in our lives.

What are the signs saying?

Whether you follow astrological charts or not, (though I don’t personally follow them closely, I’ve known enough to know) there are signs all around us pushing us towards destinations, and one of the things we need to realize is this: whenever we see a sign, we need to pay attention to it. It’s there for a reason.

Now more than ever we have this polarity going on between being spiritually guided or being drawn to the light, or even doing the right thing and what i call heart based consciousness… and then what our mind or “ego” is trying to convince us to do. It’s a constant struggle between these two. Some would say it’s the dark and the light (going from our mind and our ego is the dark, and our hearts are the light), and if you aren’t choosing everything from your heart right now… then you run the risk of recreating your suffering cycles.

This is so important for you to grasp.

Sometimes a break brings clarity…

There is so much chaos and stress happening around us right now. It can become absolutely overwhelming.I took a break recently and went back to Sedona. I knew it was necessary for me, and something that became super, super clear to me while I was there was how we all have to get back to our own personal new beginning.

Some States in the United States are going back to work and that can be complicated, but no matter what you want to feel about it… you’re a different person now then you were before all of this COVID stuff started happening.

You’re a different mom, a different friend, a different coworker. Everything has shifted inside of all of us and we have to focus on what’s truly, deeply important to us as humans: our purpose, or our “new beginning.”

The New Beginning.

So in this new beginning process, a new awakening is necessary and envisioning that new awakening is key to the entire process. It’s like I talk about in my book, Awaken Your Wealth. The first step in the process, which is most important, is the “P” which is Picturing. It involves picturing the life you want to create. Without it, there would be no progress at all.

If you look at the astrological charts, which I mentioned at the beginning of this blog, you would see that they show that everything and anything you put in the world right here and right now is what you’re going to call in for the rest of your life.

What you put into the world, what you picture, is what will become.

The things you do now, the values you set as priorities and the task you determine as important, are what will matter in the long run. That means you have an opportunity to let go of everything that’s holding you back and manifest the things you want.

Awakening Your Dream Life

I always talk about cleaning up your past while living in the present moment and planning for the future at the same time. We have a very unique opportunity right now that involves dropping everything from the past, including how you operated and how you know you no longer want to operate. You get to determine your future, as long as you focus on where you want to go and what you want to create with all the life you have ahead of you.

You get to see the signs in your life and respond to them appropriately.

Chase your dream. Chase your vision. But don’t feel as though you have to do it alone. Reach out for help along the way, take advantage of my Awaken Your Wealth, Awaken your Health, and Awaken Your Relationships opportunities.

Here’s What Might be Holding You Back

Here’s What Might be Holding You Back

Times of change and craziness really bring a lot of clarity sometimes, and one of the things I wanted to share with you guys that I’m becoming super, super clear on, especially with everything that’s going on, is this: unless we deliberately make a change, we are going to start repeating all of our old patterns, or at least try to repeat a lot of the patterns from before COVID, even if that means repeating the worst of our suffering cycles.
Here’s what I mean…

The Effects of Repeating Patterns

The other day, I went out to a restaurant to eat with my kids. It’s been a long time of social distancing and we wanted to enjoy some time out for a bit. However, as I was eating at the restaurant, I noticed something as I was eating food I hadn’t been eating for the last few months. I kept having to blow my nose because there was something in the food that I have a sensitivity to. I’d been far more careful and was choosing better foods before, but as life started going back to “normal,” I made some exceptions for myself. And it didn’t feel good.

I know this is a really, really small example but it represents a big meaning. There are so many patterns we are repeating every day, and that we’ll start repeating again once our “normal” starts up again. 

In case some of you aren’t aware of astrological charts or the Schoolman Index, the energy intensity that’s going on here on earth is massive. We are either being called to break down due to all of our patterning and stay in our suffering cycles that have created the life you have now… or we’re being called to have a breakthrough.

Are You Going to Have a Breakdown or Breakthrough?

Personally, I am going to break through every ounce I possibly can. I’m aligning with my soul in exactly what I’m here to do, because if I don’t, then the hits of life are going to keep on coming. Things are going to become more intense and if I’m unwilling to break through and align, the suffering cycles will simply continue. 

We all are going to have life lessons that prompt us to go in the direction of our soul. For many of us, that shows up in what we call a “midlife crisis.” This is when your soul starts to lead your life versus your personality, but that’s not what I’m doing. That’s not what has to happen here. You don’t have to wait for that breaking point.

No matter what age you are, you’re going through ups and downs, experiencing crisis points, but it doesn’t have to go to a crisis. You can choose to face your stuff now, just like I’m facing my stuff every day. I’m human, just like you guys, but what I’m really clear on is how important it is to keep on breaking through.

If you choose to sweep things under the rug or hide from your traumas and difficulties, this breaks you down and will absolutely start to consume you, sending you into a downward crisis spiral. The energy of today will either catapult you forward into a new beginning and a new life, or it’s going to catapult you farther down in your breakdown, consuming you on some level as the crisis keeps growing bigger… until you actually make a shift.

What’s Your Personal Journey?

I wanted to share this today because as I was sitting at lunch, trying to infiltrate back into society and then repeating old patterns that weren’t good for me, I realized how important it is to truly align with your soul. I hope you think about this, because each of us have our own individual pathway that leads to our highest and best life. I hope you do the most self loving thing. Do you, and the universe or God will fill out the rest.

Be the Light

Be the Light

There’s so much going on around us these days. Does it feel like we’re almost in this surreal experience? An out-of-body experience? I can only imagine what it’s like for those who are feeling all of this anger and sadness about what’s going on. As with most of us, it’s been a challenge for me to know the best way to navigate this time but there’s something I’m super clear on…

Anger Comes from Sadness

I learned from one of my teachers that anger is a deeper version of sadness, and that rage is a deeper version of anger… which is also sadness. I experienced a lot of anger and even rage as I was going through the last parts of my marriage, which  actually seems really small compared to what’s going on today, but I think it can help us understand a little. 

I really learned that this anger and rage I was feeling was telling me something. It was revealing how sad I was. So if you’re feeling a deep sadness or you’re in a place of rage and anger and you’re super triggered… ask yourself, “Why am I sad?” Don’t simply live with anger and rage. Question yourself, “Why am I sad?”

Sadness Can Free You

I remember towards the end of my marriage, sitting there thinking or walking around my house as I was hitting this huge patch of rage—something that wasn’t even close to the rage we’re seeing today—and I just kept asking myself, “Why am I sad? Why am I sad?” Things started to come up as I kept asking this question. It allowed my feelings to move. Rather than remaining stuck in my anger, this question helped me move forward. 

What’s happening today is that because people have stuffed so much down, kept it down, and tried to toughen up and just march through, there’s so much sadness buried deep under our anger. None of us know what it’s like to live in anyone else’s shoes, and while I have two brother-in-laws that are black and I have learned so much from the two of them over the years and am grateful for their perspective… there’s still a lot of sadness out there. For a lot of us. And so many of us don’t understand what that sadness is about because we haven’t allowed ourselves to.

The World Needs Light

What I came to learn from my experience with rage is that by shifting myself into a life that brought me happiness and joy, it not only allowed me to create a better life but it also allowed the space for others to do the same—including my ex. Even though it didn’t come in a perfect package—god knows  it didn’t come in a healthy or loving package—what I know is that as I worked on my sadness and felt through those things, I have been able to create a better future.

If we all work on our sadness and we allow ourselves to feel those feelings, hopefully in a healthier way, we can change what’s going on in our own hearts and also in the world around us. Meaning, if you’re the bright light and you can find it in yourself to share good and spread love, so much can change for the better.

There are terrible things going on around us, and I’m not suggesting we ignore it. I’m simply saying we should be the light. Be the one to spread more love. What’s needed now is a shit load of love and compassion. This need is in our faces and it’s up to us to fill that need.

I know when I finally shifted the things that were in my life and my marriage that were not in my highest and best interest, nor anyone else’s in my family, it gave the opportunity for everything to shift into a healthier alignment. And now it has. I know that all of this can get to that place too but you have to choose to be the light. You have to be the one to choose to affect your world. Even if it’s just your children, or your close circle, because it’s all energy.

Be the Light

Even if you’re not with anyone else or doing anything massive in the world, we are all one whether we like it or not. We all share this earth whether we like it or not. And we’re all here whether we like it or not. So be the bright light. I challenge each of you to find the courage, even though you may be going to a place of fear or struggle, because everything can be solved with love and compassion. I promise you that.

It’s time for us all to return back to our honor, respect, dignity, and love and compassion. I hope and trust that each one of us will find that in our own ways. We all deserve to live in a world that’s full of happiness and brightness, not one of darkness, struggle, and sadness.

It’s ok to Not Know!

It’s ok to Not Know!

There’s so much going on right now, right? So many of us are in a confusing state of having no idea whatsoever what to do next. We’ve got a lot of layering going on now, right? We have a huge pandemic, financial crisis, rioting, and protesting, and I honestly don’t think this is going to be the end of it, ladies and gentlemen.

But something I’m super, super clear on is this: it’s really, truly okay to be in a space of “I don’t know what to do next.” Here’s what I mean by that…

The Magic Phase of “I Don’t Know”

Believe it or not, there is magic in that “I don’t know” phase. It’s really okay to be in the step of not knowing because it allows you to decide what to do next. You just have to know how to move forward in the right way.

What I’d encourage you all to do when you find yourself in a state of not knowing is to ask yourself a simple question: “What is the next right step?” Don’t worry about the far-away future or finding the perfect solution to every problem. Just ask yourself, “Show me the next right step.”

A couple of years ago when I was going through my divorce process, I was very much in an emotional state of unrest. It felt as though I was undergoing an attack with literally no clue how to move forward. At least, that was my perception of it at the time.

Now that I’m on the other side of that “I don’t know” phase, I can see how I participated in my own uncertainty. Since then, I’ve proceeded to learn and grow and now that I’ve been doing the next right step, I’ve truly reached a place of health. It was okay that I didn’t know… as long as I kept moving forward with the right step in that moment.

The Importance of our Hearts

We are really being called as a society to stop operating from our minds and our egos, and to allow our hearts to find the way. I understand how difficult this is! I am highly educated, I have a whole lot of letters after my name, and this has taught me how to operate from my brain so well. But this education doesn’t tell me how to operate from my heart. Our formal educations won’t show any of us how to operate from our hearts.

My education taught me how to operate from my mind and my ego, which has served me so well for so long, but it’s not going to get me to the next place. It’s not going to get any of us to the next place… and that’s what’s so important. We have to understand the importance of what our heart wants. We have to ask for the next right step in our heart.

Trust me when I say that we’re all in uncharted turf with pandemic, economics, protesting, and rioting. Asking yourself, “What is the next right step?” can only come from your heart… and it’s the only way you’re going to find your answer.

How to Avoid Shutting Down

I’m not saying this is easy. We can all go into a protective, shut-down mode during these crazy times. But we need to understand that the gift in all of this craziness is that we’re all being given an opportunity to face our past traumas. When we’re triggered, that means that something needs to shift within ourselves from an emotional healing perspective. This actually has nothing to do with what’s going on right now, even though our brain and our ego want us to think it does.

So if you’re going through stress or major anxiety and you’re tempted to blame the present circumstances or you’re worried about the future, take a second to breathe. On a scale of one to ten, determine how triggered you are. And then perform a thing called havening: cross your arms and run your hands down from your shoulders to at least your elbows, twenty times.

This helps you connect your left and right brain, and align your heart, which shifts the grooves in your brain from your amygdala (which are creating a lot of your response systems) to the front of your brain, helping you live in the present and not the past traumas in your life. 

Ask yourself again, on a scale of one to ten, how triggered are you? Repeat as needed and let your anxiety lower.

Final Thoughts

I hope you know that I’m sending so much love to you all today! Just remember to keep asking yourself, “What is the next right step?” and trust your heart to show you the way. If you ever need more help, stop by my Facebook lives, or check out my Youtube channel for more resources.

How to Reestablish Your Knowing

How to Reestablish Your Knowing

Today I want to give you three tips on how you can reestablish your “knowing,” which is what’s going on in your heart and body, and not just your head. It’s time to fully choose happiness. Choose health. Choose an end to distractions. Seek these things out.

I hope you’re ready!

3 Tips for Reestablishing Your Knowing

1. Catch Your Contemplation

One of the first ways you can tell that you’re in your mind or ego and not your inner knowing is that you’re contemplating different scenarios, trying to decide between this and that, and ultimately wrapped up in an inner debate with yourself.

Think about it. What ways do you get stuck in your head?

If you find yourself asking, “What about this? Or what about that? But this? But that? But this?” then understand this as a clear sign that you are not in your inner knowing. If you were in your inner knowing, you wouldn’t be pulling this grand debate up and going back and forth about it.

So how do we fix this?

You first have to recognize that you are in your mind, having an inner conflict, and need to reestablish your inner knowing. Begin by taking a deep breath, then breathe all the conflict out. It might sound simple, but this helps get you back into your body, which helps you reestablish your knowing.

2. Be Honest About Your Distractions

You know you’re not in your inner knowing when your physical body is reacting in some way. Everyone has a body intelligence that is absolutely incredible. The issue is that we’ve ignored it, particularly here in the western world, for generations. Even so, our body intelligence shows up in various ways.

For example, you find yourself choosing various distractions (eating, smoking, drinking, etc.) and your body is showing signs of anxiety or depression. These things are telling you that you are not in your knowing.

To reestablish your knowing, you need to get back into your body. Start by asking questions: why am I feeling this anxiety? Why did I just grab that bar of chocolate and shove it in my mouth? Why did I crack open that soda and chug it? Why am I choosing to smoke cigarettes and feeling like I need to distract myself?

There’s an awful lot of us who are not aligned with our body intelligence these days, so try to reestablish your knowing by not buying those things that are distractions for you the next time you go to the grocery store. Pause, realize when you’re in anxiety and when you’re choosing distractions, and then start making conscious choices to not participate in those distractions. This way, you can get back to your body and be in your inner knowing.

3. Beware of Repeating Patterns

How often do you find yourself repeating patterns? Maybe you’ve realized, “Hey, I’m having this conversation again with another person, and it’s the same conversation I’ve been having for a decade, and it’s like going down the same path, and I keep recreating this suffering cycle… ”

Can you relate?

What these cycles tell me is that you’re not in your knowing. How do I know this? Because you’re approaching things from the back of your head, from your amygdala, which is where all your subconscious patterning comes from. Any of you who’ve watched me or read my book before know that when we follow our subconscious patterning (in our amygdala), we can’t also live in the present moment (processed by our frontal lobe). We can’t be in these two places at once.

Remember that we have two operating systems: our conscious mind and our subconscious mind. So if we’re coming from our subconscious mind, we’re responding with a pattern that has been ingrained in us for our entire lives because these patterns have been established by the time we’re seven years old.

So how do you reestablish your knowing after being in the place of repeating subconscious patterns? With a thing called “havening.” You have to cross your left and right brain again, and here’s how you do that:

Havening Explained

Begin by identifying how triggered you are on a scale of one to ten. Be honest with yourself. Then cross your arms over your front and run your hands from your shoulders all the way down to at least your elbows. Repeat twenty times. Once you’re done with your twenty, think again, “Where am I on my one-to-ten chart?”

When I do this on a physical level, it pulls me out of my subconscious mind and my past, putting me into my present moment. Not only that, but it physiologically changes me on a cellular level so I am better prepared to proceed in my knowing.

The Proof

Here’s the proof I want you to look for so you know you’re getting closer to being in your knowing: you’re having fewer inner debates, you’re getting involved in fewer power struggles, you’re having less anxiety and depression, or you’re in fewer repeating conversations, events, and patterns. When you’ve done the work and gotten into your knowing, these toxic things will all fall away.

Then the trick is, you must allow them to fall away. That’s the key.