Blog Layout

Divorce Because Every Day Matters

Julie Murphy • January 6, 2021
You may be considering divorcing your spouse, friendship, parents, siblings, co-workers or other relationships that are causing you to suffer. How do we know when the time is right? Or is it right? All we know on the inside is that something is not working for you at that moment of time. We put up with continual behaviors and patterns for far too long. Why do we stay? We stay because of the stories and roles we have played that are familiar and it’s easier to stay with what we know versus venturing out into the unknown. It takes a lot of courage to push out of our personal patterning. Again, it’s the stories that keep us stuck.


Stories, stories, stories……this is how we play out our lives. Many times the stories we tell ourselves come from our experiences in life and the experiences of the generations before us. This week, I was reminded about how when we interface with others, especially long term relationships, whether be spouse, family or otherwise, many times we follow our conditioning as opposed to our authentic selves. Many times these stories cause us to suffer keeping us from moving forward.

I have seen countless times when a relationship is not working, and when one of the parties just makes it an option to be willing to leave, it shifts the entire relationship. You have to be WILLING to leave. Be willing to change. Be willing to invite in the new. Why? Because you will stop suffering and you will respond differently to things in life. When you are willing to walk away, it actually frees everyone involved. And, as a side note, this also shifts people financially too.

Many people don’t get divorced because they are afraid of what the financials look on the other side of a divorce. I can tell you, I’ve had client after client tell me they were afraid of what their financial reality will be on the other side. What we need to realize in this process, is that you are left with you on the other side. Yes, you and only you. And when you have no one else to point the finger at, you will be forced to look in your own mirror. The only thing I’ve watched people fear is when they are choosing not to be the best version of themselves. We chose to blame your spouse for why you are stuck, shame your family for not being different, guilt your kids for not filling your expectations and judge them all – your spouse, boss, sibling, parents, etc, but that only works for so long. If you’ve spent a lifetime doing this, then you will keep chasing and never feel whole within yourself. And to top it off on some level you will always financially struggle. Some to it by repeating the debt cycle over and over again. Some do it by having to split their money from divorce, or a failing business, or getting laid off, etc. All situations that have cash walking out the door as opposed to growing and being abundant.

If on the flipside, if you’re like me, you may have been the one that has constantly interfered with other people lives by doing too much for them, your kids, employees, your spouse, your siblings and even in some cases your parents. When you don’t allow others to have the full experience of what they are choosing in the world, they can’t evolve to be the best version of themselves. We do it to “do the right thing” or “to help support them when they are down” and in reality, we are crippling them more the more we bail them out. When one gives too much to others, and not in alignment with them on every level, it is accompanied by expectations being set. Expectations of how those people should act in return and this comes from the fact that you on some level feel put out. When I’ve done this in the past, particularly with my siblings, it only created more suffering for me.

I had an experience one day that taught me that I didn’t necessarily need to divorce my siblings, but I needed to release all expectations and I needed to stop giving so much because I felt put out. This often caused me to get physically sick as well, could have been as easy as a cold or as bad as being laid out for a week or two with the flu. It took me a while to realize this really had nothing to do with my siblings, it had everything to do with little old me. I was continuing this pattern to keep my story alive. My childhood put me in a parenting role with my siblings being the 2nd oldest of 12 children. It naturally just happened that way. A gift my childhood gave me was the skills to run a successful business today. The shadow side was that I needed to learn to just keep busy being myself and doing my soul work in the world. I did so by staying in a place of being an observer and listener, not problem solver, when it came to the interface with my siblings. And when I felt a certain way, I communicated it, but steered clear of telling them what I think because that just meant I fell back into being a problem solver for them. By doing so, this has freed me and freed them at the same time.

Ask yourself these questions:

  • What suffering patterns do you see over and over again in your relationship that you are considering a divorce?
  • How have you participated?
  • If someone is pressing your buttons, it’s really about something that needs to shift within yourself. What are those buttons that need to be healed within you?
  • What does a healthy relationship look like to you?     
How does this all fit into money? Well, when you participate in relationships that are operating from a place of scarcity, struggle, or suffering, there’s no way full abundance can come your way in all areas of your life, including financials. That is why this is important as you do self-reflection; you need to consider all areas of your life to look at Personal, Financial, Family, and Work Life. If one wants to shift, stop repeating patterns, or improve their financial lives, one must address all the emotions going on inside their lives as a whole, otherwise you will ebb and flow and all will stay approximately the same, unless you give yourself the gift of your own emotional freedom and choose to change those patterns of suffering.

Choose You! Choose to Divorce or Release unhealthy relationships! Just start shifting one of those relationships this week. Express gratitude for that person in your life and what they have given you and gratitude for what they will give you in this divorce process. Send them love and light along the way.

xo

Julie

Share Blog On Social

A woman is smiling while money is falling around her.
A sign that says join julie on youtube
A book titled the spiritual laws of money
Get it NOW!

Recent Blogs


Emotions around money show up in our bodies in ways we don’t always realize.
By Julie Murphy 29 Oct, 2024
Money isn’t just something we deal with mentally or emotionally—it’s physical too. Whether we’re conscious of it or not, financial stress impacts our bodies.
By Julie Murphy 02 Oct, 2024
In my book, " The 4 Spiritual Laws of Money , " I explain that wealth isn’t just about managing money—it's about aligning with the deeper, spiritual principles that guide our financial lives. These four laws offer a powerful framework to create lasting abundance, but they aren’t a one-time fix. Instead, they are tools to be revisited and reapplied throughout your journey. Reapplying the 4 Spiritual Laws of Money for Continuous Growth We all know the feeling—just when you think you've got your finances in order, something shifts, and it feels like you're back at square one. Maybe an unexpected expense pops up, or perhaps your goals change as your life evolves. Whatever the reason, financial growth is not a “set it and forget it” journey. It requires ongoing effort, reflection, and adjustment. This is where the 4 Spiritual Laws of Money come in. These laws aren’t just one-time lessons; they are a powerful framework that you can revisit and reapply whenever life (or your bank account) needs a tune-up. Let’s dive into how each law can be reworked into your daily life, helping you to stay on the path of financial abundance. 1. Manifestation Begins with Desire You’ve likely heard it before— knowing what you truly want is the first step to creating it. But here’s the thing: what you want today might be different from what you desired a few years ago. Life changes, and so do your dreams. Take a moment to check in with yourself. What do you really desire now? Is it financial freedom, a vacation home, or maybe the ability to give back to your community in a bigger way? Whatever it is, don’t be afraid to dream big. Let your desires guide you as they evolve. Reaffirming your desires regularly ensures that you're always manifesting what aligns with the current version of you. 2. The Heart Is Stronger Than the Brain When it comes to money, we’re often told to “be logical” or “stick to the numbers.” But one of the most beautiful spiritual laws of money reminds us that the heart is stronger than the brain . In other words, decisions made from a place of love, passion, and authenticity are far more powerful than those made from fear or strict logic. Ask yourself: Are your current financial choices aligned with your heart? Does how you’re making and spending money feel good on a soul level? When you revisit this law, you might realize it's time to adjust your financial strategy to better match your heart’s desires. This could mean choosing a career path that fulfills you or focusing on spending in ways that bring you joy, not just security. 3. Intention Redirects Energy The power of intention is real. When you set a focused intention, you shift the energy of your life in that direction. But the key word here is focused. As life moves forward, it’s easy to let distractions pull your energy in too many directions. That’s why it’s crucial to regularly revisit your intentions. Are they still aligned with where you want to go? Take time to refocus. This might mean creating new financial goals or reaffirming old ones. By re-centering your intentions, you’re not only redirecting your energy—you’re also inviting the universe to step in and help you make those goals a reality. 4. The Universe Responds to Action We’ve all been there: thinking, dreaming, planning—but not doing. This is where the fourth spiritual law comes in as a loving nudge. The universe can only respond when you take action. What steps have you taken lately toward your financial goals? Even small actions—like setting up an automatic savings plan or looking into a new investment—send powerful signals to the universe that you’re serious about manifesting abundance. And the universe will respond! The more action you take, the more opportunities seem to “magically” appear. Remember, action doesn’t have to be overwhelming. Start small, but be consistent. Every step you take builds momentum toward your goals. Why Reapplying the Laws Matters Life is full of changes. Your financial situation, goals, and even your mindset will evolve over time. That’s why it’s essential to revisit and reapply the 4 Spiritual Laws of Money regularly. They’re not static rules but a dynamic, flexible framework that grows with you. Think of these laws like a compass for your financial journey. Whenever you feel off track, return to them. When you’re uncertain about your next move, let them guide you. The more you use them, the more they’ll become a natural part of how you think and act around money. Embrace the Journey Remember, financial growth is a journey, not a destination. There will be twists, turns, and perhaps a few bumps along the way, but with the 4 Spiritual Laws of Money, you’re never lost. These principles are here to help you continuously grow, adapt, and realign with your true financial path—one that leads not just to wealth, but to joy, freedom, and fulfillment. So, the next time you feel a shift in your financial landscape, don’t panic. Instead, revisit these laws, reapply them, and watch how they continue to guide you toward your next level of abundance. Now, what’s your next step? If you found these insights helpful, you’ll love " The 4 Spiritual Laws of Money , " where these principles are explored in depth. It’s now available as an audiobook, making it easier than ever to absorb these powerful lessons on the go. Whether you're commuting, exercising, or relaxing, you can take the wisdom of these spiritual laws with you wherever you are. Start your journey to financial and spiritual abundance today!
By Julie Murphy 03 Sep, 2024
As someone who has guided countless clients toward true wealth, I know how crucial it is to build financial stability, especially in times like these. And that’s where my approach, outlined in my first book, "The Emotion Behind Money" , comes into play. In my work, I emphasize that wealth isn’t just about numbers—it's about what's happening inside you as much as what's happening around you. The Emotion Behind Money is all about building wealth from the inside out, which means bringing your authentic self to the forefront of your financial decisions. When your money is aligned with who you truly are, you create a foundation that can withstand even the most uncertain times. Feeling anxious about the future—whether it’s due to financial, economic, or inflation-related concerns—is a common experience. But often, that anxiety signals that your money isn’t set up in alignment with your authentic self. When this alignment is off, it’s easy to feel ungrounded and uncertain. I’ve seen this time and again in my work as a financial planner, and I’m here to help you shift from anxiety to assurance by realigning your financial life with who you really are. Let’s face it: the economic landscape is challenging right now. Inflation is driving up costs on essentials like gas, food, and education. Interest rates are climbing, and while wage growth might seem positive, it can have long-term consequences for the economy. It’s easy to get caught up in these concerns, but I believe there’s a better way to approach them. The Outside vs. The Inside When we think about wealth, we often focus on external factors: the stock market, interest rates, inflation, job security, and so on. These things are important, but they’re only part of the picture. What’s going on inside you—your beliefs, values, and emotions —plays an equally crucial role in your financial stability. If you’re feeling anxious about the future, it might be a sign that your finances aren’t fully aligned with your true self . When you’re not grounded in your financial decisions, it’s easy to feel out of control and overwhelmed by external events. But when your money is set up in a way that reflects who you are and what you value, you’ll find that you can navigate uncertainty with much more confidence and peace of mind. Creating Financial Space One of the most important steps you can take to create financial stability is to build financial space. This means having enough room in your budget to handle unexpected expenses, economic downturns, or other financial challenges without feeling panicked. Start by taking a close look at your current financial situation. Are there areas where you could reduce your debt? Are there expenses you could eliminate or cut back on? By making these adjustments, you can free up cash flow that can be redirected into savings or investments, creating a buffer that will protect you in times of uncertainty. I’ve created a Cashflow Worksheet to help you get started on this journey. You can download it here . Another crucial aspect of creating financial space is to avoid taking on unnecessary debt. For example, many people take out loans from their 401K accounts, thinking it’s a quick fix. But in the long run, this can lead to more financial stress. Instead, focus on building up your savings so that you have the cash on hand to cover unexpected expenses without resorting to credit cards or loans. Empower Your Choices A big part of building financial stability is recognizing that you have a choice in how you manage your money. It’s easy to feel like a victim of the system, especially when you’re facing financial pressure. But when you realize that you have the power to make decisions that align with your values and goals, you take control of your financial future. For example, instead of feeling like you "have to" use credit cards to cover expenses, reframe it as a choice. If you truly need to use credit, do so with intention and a plan to pay it off quickly. But if it’s possible to avoid it, choose to do so. This simple shift in mindset can make a huge difference in how you feel about your financial situation. Insulate Yourself from Economic Uncertainty We can’t control what’s happening in the global economy, but we can take steps to insulate ourselves from its effects. This starts with being proactive about your finances. By setting up your money in a way that aligns with your true self, you create a foundation that can weather any storm. Whether it’s building up your savings, reducing your debt, or making thoughtful financial choices, every step you take toward financial stability helps to create a sense of security. And that security isn’t just about having more money in the bank—it’s about knowing that you’re in control of your financial future, no matter what happens in the world around you.
Show More

Similar Blogs

Emotions around money show up in our bodies in ways we don’t always realize.
By Julie Murphy 29 Oct, 2024
Money isn’t just something we deal with mentally or emotionally—it’s physical too. Whether we’re conscious of it or not, financial stress impacts our bodies.
By Julie Murphy 02 Oct, 2024
In my book, " The 4 Spiritual Laws of Money , " I explain that wealth isn’t just about managing money—it's about aligning with the deeper, spiritual principles that guide our financial lives. These four laws offer a powerful framework to create lasting abundance, but they aren’t a one-time fix. Instead, they are tools to be revisited and reapplied throughout your journey. Reapplying the 4 Spiritual Laws of Money for Continuous Growth We all know the feeling—just when you think you've got your finances in order, something shifts, and it feels like you're back at square one. Maybe an unexpected expense pops up, or perhaps your goals change as your life evolves. Whatever the reason, financial growth is not a “set it and forget it” journey. It requires ongoing effort, reflection, and adjustment. This is where the 4 Spiritual Laws of Money come in. These laws aren’t just one-time lessons; they are a powerful framework that you can revisit and reapply whenever life (or your bank account) needs a tune-up. Let’s dive into how each law can be reworked into your daily life, helping you to stay on the path of financial abundance. 1. Manifestation Begins with Desire You’ve likely heard it before— knowing what you truly want is the first step to creating it. But here’s the thing: what you want today might be different from what you desired a few years ago. Life changes, and so do your dreams. Take a moment to check in with yourself. What do you really desire now? Is it financial freedom, a vacation home, or maybe the ability to give back to your community in a bigger way? Whatever it is, don’t be afraid to dream big. Let your desires guide you as they evolve. Reaffirming your desires regularly ensures that you're always manifesting what aligns with the current version of you. 2. The Heart Is Stronger Than the Brain When it comes to money, we’re often told to “be logical” or “stick to the numbers.” But one of the most beautiful spiritual laws of money reminds us that the heart is stronger than the brain . In other words, decisions made from a place of love, passion, and authenticity are far more powerful than those made from fear or strict logic. Ask yourself: Are your current financial choices aligned with your heart? Does how you’re making and spending money feel good on a soul level? When you revisit this law, you might realize it's time to adjust your financial strategy to better match your heart’s desires. This could mean choosing a career path that fulfills you or focusing on spending in ways that bring you joy, not just security. 3. Intention Redirects Energy The power of intention is real. When you set a focused intention, you shift the energy of your life in that direction. But the key word here is focused. As life moves forward, it’s easy to let distractions pull your energy in too many directions. That’s why it’s crucial to regularly revisit your intentions. Are they still aligned with where you want to go? Take time to refocus. This might mean creating new financial goals or reaffirming old ones. By re-centering your intentions, you’re not only redirecting your energy—you’re also inviting the universe to step in and help you make those goals a reality. 4. The Universe Responds to Action We’ve all been there: thinking, dreaming, planning—but not doing. This is where the fourth spiritual law comes in as a loving nudge. The universe can only respond when you take action. What steps have you taken lately toward your financial goals? Even small actions—like setting up an automatic savings plan or looking into a new investment—send powerful signals to the universe that you’re serious about manifesting abundance. And the universe will respond! The more action you take, the more opportunities seem to “magically” appear. Remember, action doesn’t have to be overwhelming. Start small, but be consistent. Every step you take builds momentum toward your goals. Why Reapplying the Laws Matters Life is full of changes. Your financial situation, goals, and even your mindset will evolve over time. That’s why it’s essential to revisit and reapply the 4 Spiritual Laws of Money regularly. They’re not static rules but a dynamic, flexible framework that grows with you. Think of these laws like a compass for your financial journey. Whenever you feel off track, return to them. When you’re uncertain about your next move, let them guide you. The more you use them, the more they’ll become a natural part of how you think and act around money. Embrace the Journey Remember, financial growth is a journey, not a destination. There will be twists, turns, and perhaps a few bumps along the way, but with the 4 Spiritual Laws of Money, you’re never lost. These principles are here to help you continuously grow, adapt, and realign with your true financial path—one that leads not just to wealth, but to joy, freedom, and fulfillment. So, the next time you feel a shift in your financial landscape, don’t panic. Instead, revisit these laws, reapply them, and watch how they continue to guide you toward your next level of abundance. Now, what’s your next step? If you found these insights helpful, you’ll love " The 4 Spiritual Laws of Money , " where these principles are explored in depth. It’s now available as an audiobook, making it easier than ever to absorb these powerful lessons on the go. Whether you're commuting, exercising, or relaxing, you can take the wisdom of these spiritual laws with you wherever you are. Start your journey to financial and spiritual abundance today!
By Julie Murphy 03 Sep, 2024
As someone who has guided countless clients toward true wealth, I know how crucial it is to build financial stability, especially in times like these. And that’s where my approach, outlined in my first book, "The Emotion Behind Money" , comes into play. In my work, I emphasize that wealth isn’t just about numbers—it's about what's happening inside you as much as what's happening around you. The Emotion Behind Money is all about building wealth from the inside out, which means bringing your authentic self to the forefront of your financial decisions. When your money is aligned with who you truly are, you create a foundation that can withstand even the most uncertain times. Feeling anxious about the future—whether it’s due to financial, economic, or inflation-related concerns—is a common experience. But often, that anxiety signals that your money isn’t set up in alignment with your authentic self. When this alignment is off, it’s easy to feel ungrounded and uncertain. I’ve seen this time and again in my work as a financial planner, and I’m here to help you shift from anxiety to assurance by realigning your financial life with who you really are. Let’s face it: the economic landscape is challenging right now. Inflation is driving up costs on essentials like gas, food, and education. Interest rates are climbing, and while wage growth might seem positive, it can have long-term consequences for the economy. It’s easy to get caught up in these concerns, but I believe there’s a better way to approach them. The Outside vs. The Inside When we think about wealth, we often focus on external factors: the stock market, interest rates, inflation, job security, and so on. These things are important, but they’re only part of the picture. What’s going on inside you—your beliefs, values, and emotions —plays an equally crucial role in your financial stability. If you’re feeling anxious about the future, it might be a sign that your finances aren’t fully aligned with your true self . When you’re not grounded in your financial decisions, it’s easy to feel out of control and overwhelmed by external events. But when your money is set up in a way that reflects who you are and what you value, you’ll find that you can navigate uncertainty with much more confidence and peace of mind. Creating Financial Space One of the most important steps you can take to create financial stability is to build financial space. This means having enough room in your budget to handle unexpected expenses, economic downturns, or other financial challenges without feeling panicked. Start by taking a close look at your current financial situation. Are there areas where you could reduce your debt? Are there expenses you could eliminate or cut back on? By making these adjustments, you can free up cash flow that can be redirected into savings or investments, creating a buffer that will protect you in times of uncertainty. I’ve created a Cashflow Worksheet to help you get started on this journey. You can download it here . Another crucial aspect of creating financial space is to avoid taking on unnecessary debt. For example, many people take out loans from their 401K accounts, thinking it’s a quick fix. But in the long run, this can lead to more financial stress. Instead, focus on building up your savings so that you have the cash on hand to cover unexpected expenses without resorting to credit cards or loans. Empower Your Choices A big part of building financial stability is recognizing that you have a choice in how you manage your money. It’s easy to feel like a victim of the system, especially when you’re facing financial pressure. But when you realize that you have the power to make decisions that align with your values and goals, you take control of your financial future. For example, instead of feeling like you "have to" use credit cards to cover expenses, reframe it as a choice. If you truly need to use credit, do so with intention and a plan to pay it off quickly. But if it’s possible to avoid it, choose to do so. This simple shift in mindset can make a huge difference in how you feel about your financial situation. Insulate Yourself from Economic Uncertainty We can’t control what’s happening in the global economy, but we can take steps to insulate ourselves from its effects. This starts with being proactive about your finances. By setting up your money in a way that aligns with your true self, you create a foundation that can weather any storm. Whether it’s building up your savings, reducing your debt, or making thoughtful financial choices, every step you take toward financial stability helps to create a sense of security. And that security isn’t just about having more money in the bank—it’s about knowing that you’re in control of your financial future, no matter what happens in the world around you.
Protect Your Energy and Shift Your Money Mindset for Greater Clarity and Abundance
By Julie Murphy 27 Aug, 2024
Clear the path to prosperity by focusing on what truly serves your highest good in terms of wealth and well-being.
Show More
Share by: